Author: Vanessa Gardner

  • AI is our idol, and we are eating its fruit.

    As AI creeps into schools, businesses, and the daily lives of citizens, the consequences of this idolatry are imminent. Right now, AI just looks like silly Facebook cat videos and essays written in 10 seconds, but it is deeper and more corrosive than that. 

    AI is taking more than it gives:

    AI is actively taking jobs away from Americans. It is stripping us of agricultural land and land that could be used for housing or for protecting/preserving wildlife. Our casual use of generative AI like ChatGPT, Sora, and Gemini is depriving us of our perfectly good drinking water for communities, farmland, and cattle. Communities are already being affected by low water pressure and damaged water quality in towns where data centers are located. Idaho depends on farms and cattle to function and provide for our country. We are already seeing a decline in farms and farmers in recent decades due to money, regulations, and droughts. AI data centers are ONLY adding to this problem. Data centers are currently being built and designed to sit above ground on good land, and large amounts of it. Currently, there is a data center approved for construction in Utah that would be 40,000 acres of private land. The entire community recently held a meeting in Box Elder County and voted to oppose the data center by a majority. Despite massive backlash, the commission voted to approve the project. This also drives up costs in the local community at a time where inflation and the cost of living couldn’t be worse.

    Land ownership has been the backbone of this country since its beginning of its inception. Owning land in America is the American dream. Data centers are being weaponised on this property under the guise that people can do whatever they want on their property, completely neglecting the consequences it has on the surrounding area. The dramatic scene in Box Elder County on May 4th paints a broader picture of the state of the country. When the voters no longer have a voice, we no longer have a democracy. This data center will be about 300 miles away from Boise, Idaho. The data center will affect more than just the residents, but people from states all around it. The water rights purchased for this project could provide for around 20,000 Utah residents. Instead, it is feeding the ever-growing need for funny cat videos and cartoon profile pictures. 

    AI is making us unintelligent and powerless:

    Using AI tools for simple things like a Google search, fun questions, or extra opinions are avenues to slowly losing critical thinking skills that educators and parents have worked tirelessly to nurture. When we stop asking ourselves critical questions and solely rely on fast technology, we are stunting the growth of minds that are far more capable than the current AI technology we have. Recent studies suggest that AI is smoothing our brains and lowering our ability to remember information quickly. When we don’t have to reach further into the mind to retrieve information, we are losing the neuropathways our brains have worked hard to create. This also stunts neuroplasticity in the brain. A research Scientist at Harvard explains that 

    “I aim to help students consider the wealth of research on how human minds work so that they can make the best use of their particular mind (with its normative and non-normative characteristics). Then I ask them to compare to AI to think carefully about when and how they decide to use each. I hope it leads them to a fuller appreciation for their incredible minds and abilities!” Tina Grotzer, Staff Researcher at Harvard University

    Senior Lecturer Fawwaz Habbal at Harvard University states:

    “While AI excels in data processing and statistics, it lacks the ability to create truly innovative and creative solutions; machines calculate and they do not have human experiences.” 

    Dan Levy at Harvard said this,

    “If a student uses AI to do the work for them, rather than to do the work with them, there’s not going to be much learning. No learning occurs unless the brain is actively engaged in making meaning and sense of what you’re trying to learn, and this is not going to occur if you just ask ChatGPT, “Give me the answer to the question that the instructor is asking.””

    These experts all had reasons they support the use of some AI tools, especially for advanced algebraic equations, high-powered computing, and reasonable questions that are not easily answered. If AI is being used, it needs to be for something good, purposeful, and world-changing. The problem is, big AI innovators are not focusing on ways AI can make the world better, but on the profit it can make them. Money has been dividing the AI advancement community, further proving the corruption in its system.

    We cannot fully fathom the result of creating such high-performing AI programs and huge data centers. We have not done it before, and we cannot say for sure what will and won’t happen. The more we mess with this technology expansion, the riskier it gets for everyone. Right now, we are welcoming an unknown intelligent technology that one day we will lose control of. We are quite literally handing our autonomy and power over to AI, all for the spirit of advancement and possible innovation. And we are letting it drain us of good drinking water.

    AI is unbiblical:

    Building this technology and designing it from the human brain, in my opinion, is unbiblical. From my perspective, it only seems like humans want to have the power of God by making their own version of “life”. It is the first sin of humankind- doubting God and taking things into our own hands. Just like in the Garden of Eden when Eve and Adam ate the fruit God commanded against, we are biting into a fruit God never intended for us to have. Our reliance on AI is gross and spiritually lazy.

    It makes me cringe when I learn about the origin of AI. The creators started by making it specifically to generate outcomes based on how the human brain computes information. The Turing Machine that every computer has been created from was made paralleling the way our neurotransmitters pass information across the brain. This has now morphed into new AI technology capabilities. We are not God; we do not get to create life as He does. We cannot properly replicate the human brain without huge consequences. We get to play a part in creating children, but AI takes it to a level I would compare to the Tower of Babel. They have created an intelligent being in their own image.

    I can also see how easily AI could be used as a distraction and deception during the end times. Jesus will come on the clouds (Revelation 1:7). I worry that the use of AI will become so advanced that an antichrist spirit could use the technology to sway millions of people into believing a false god as Jesus appears. Scripture says that even the elect will be deceived if possible (Matthew 24:24). When many Christians already rely on AI to guide them, generate images, and answer prompts for them, I am concerned that they will not have the spiritual eyes to see the truth when it is in front of them. AI becomes more advanced every day as we get smarter and feed it new data to advance its technologies. 

    Alternate Data Centers:

    What saddens me the most is that above-ground, fresh-water-cooling data centers are not the only option. Microsoft had successfully created a data center below the ocean, but found that underwater noise actually disrupted the data center more aggressively than originally thought. These centers pose possible threats to marine life and are difficult to maintain. Recently, new developments have been made in this technology, specifically by the company Panthalassa. Panthalassa is working on developing floating nodes that will use ocean waves to generate electricity and the cold ocean temperatures to cool the systems when in use. Right now, I don’t support the creation of any AI data centers, but I would prefer that the ones being created are done in a way that does not harm nature, wildlife, water, and our local communities.

    CEO’s and AI innovators are doing just about anything to get these data centers made. That dedication is something I would compare to worship. Spending tens of billions of dollars for thousand-acre data centers is something I never could have fathomed five years ago. What is scary about this is that the people with the money are less likely to be stopped, even with loud public backlash. Our world relies on systems of greed and envy that even AI cannot suffice, and voices may not stop. People who do not rely on the love and forgiveness of Jesus do not have the moral compass needed to care enough about the outcome of worshipping this new technology. 

    If billionaires are willing to spend their money on data centers, my question is, why hasn’t that money gone towards ending world hunger instead? Why has this money been made available for something so incredibly unnecessary when we have problems being added to our plates from the very thing they are trying to fund? I am afraid we all know the answer to that question. Greed. 

    Conclusion:

    We are giving too much power to an unknown technology and wasting our resources and brainpower while we use it. AI uses up our water, land, and money. It is being programmed to replace working people at their jobs. It takes more than it gives; it was made with unclear intentions beyond creating false intelligence in the image of mankind. It makes us more mentally dull and allows us to be lazier every time we use it, rather than using our own creativity. It is currently being made for profit instead of people, and it spreads misinformation. Its advanced techniques are being used for hacking sensitive personal data, leaving us more at risk than ever before. It takes up massive amounts of space, which strips us of land that could be used for housing, livestock, farmland, preservation, recreation, or, quite literally, anything more useful than AI prompts. AI needs to be heavily regulated and, in many cases, banned. The use of AI has consequences beyond our comprehension and needs to be treated as such.

     If we continue to worship the creation and use of AI, it will destroy us, our land, and our mental capacity. If we refuse to fight it, we must be aware that the consequences might be irreversible. 

    If you want AI data centers out of Idaho, sign this petition here:

    https://www.change.org/ai-less-idaho

    Sources Cited 

    “AI data centers, already harmful, appear to be creating their own microclimates”. Client Challenge, www.sfgate.com/bayarea/article/ai-data-center-microclimates-22236756.php. Accessed 14 May 2026.

    “AI Data Centers May Soon Ride Ocean Waves”. Cyberguy, cyberguy.com/ai/ai-data-centers-ride-ocean-waves/. Accessed 14 May 2026.

    Leiainthefield. “Hundreds of Utahns File to Block Kevin O’Leary’s Proposed Massive Data Center Campus over Water Concerns.” The Salt Lake Tribune, 1 May 2026, www.sltrib.com/news/environment/2026/05/01/utahns-send-state-deluge-concerns/. Accessed 14 May 2026.

    Mineo, Liz. “Is AI Dulling Our Minds?” Harvard Gazette, 13 Nov. 2025, news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2025/11/is-ai-dulling-our-minds/. Accessed 14 May 2026.

  • Six Days Past Eighteen: Open Chapters

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  • Shepherds and Fields, Flocks and Grains

    We all need bread. Where are you getting yours?

    “Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. But the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary; you have found favor with God. You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over Jacob’s descendants forever; his kingdom will never end.” “How will this be,” Mary asked the angel, “since I am a virgin?” The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come on you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God.” Luke 1:29-35

    Jesus was born of the Virgin Mary and then placed in a manger. A trough for livestock to eat from, something so close to the ground, not glorious, and likely not very clean. God chose to be born like every man is, from a woman, and entered the world as an infant. He did not have the riches that many of us have. He didn’t have a stroller, mattress, or cute baby photos parents like to hold onto. He couldn’t even talk yet. He had a loving family and a loving Father. But he was born in a low place that sheep, goats, and cattle would’ve eaten out of. That might not seem like the ideal place for the Son of God to be born, but it had a divine purpose. 

    I can’t stop thinking about the fact that Jesus chose to be born and placed in a manger. This relates directly to so many things Jesus says throughout His life. He is the Good Shepherd, the spotless Lamb of God, the Bread of life… Even His entry into this world shows us exactly who He is to us. He was placed low, laid down for us, sacrificing Himself so we could have life. How significant is it that the God of the universe decided to be food for His sheep even from His first moments of life? 

    Not only that, Bethlehem, the place of Jesus’ birth, can be translated to “The Place of Bread”. So the Bread of Life was laid in a manger for His sheep—in the Place of Bread—to become food for the souls of His followers. How miraculous that God would orchestrate such a beautiful thing to happen. Scripture is full of this idea being planned and later fleshed out by Jesus, Old Testament and New. From the first moment of Jesus’ life, God entered the world to feed His sheep, both physically and spiritually. 

    When Jesus came as a child in a manger, He did it in the way that, through prophecy in the Old Testament, people would find Him. People who were searching for a king and the Messiah. There is plenty of prophecy that speaks of Jesus’ birth. Genesis 49:10, Numbers 24, and Daniel 2 and 9 point us to the birth of Jesus. Daniel 9:25 lays out the exact time it would take for the “anointed prince” would come to rebuild and restore Jerusalem. It shows that it would take 483 years from the walls of Jerusalem being rebuilt in 445 BC for the Messiah to come. And Jesus rode into Jerusalem at the EXACT time prophesied, not early or late, at AD 33. 

    That announcement confirmed his Messianic position. If Jesus were born a year earlier or later than when He was, or announced Himself earlier than He did, then the prophecy would not be valid. Because of God’s perfect, divine timing, that prophecy brings substantial credibility to the idea of Jesus being the Messiah by the actual day and year He was born and named King. His birth marks the exact day the Messiah was brought into the world. His birth had such a great purpose, and His presence was prophesied hundreds of years before He came. This makes His entry into the world that much sweeter.

    The Christmas story tells us that Jesus revealed Himself first to the shepherds. He also calls us His sheep. I love comparing us to sheep since Jesus does the same thing. Because of the way Jesus entered into the world, it had me thinking about shepherds and fields, flocks and grains.

    “Acknowledge that the LORD is God! He made us, and we are his. We are his people, the sheep of his pasture.” Psalm 100:3 NLT

    “He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; He gently leads those that have young.” Isaiah 40:11 NIV

    “The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.” Psalm 23:1-3 NIV

    “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. The hired hand is not the shepherd and does not own the sheep. So when he sees the wolf coming, he abandons the sheep and runs away. Then the wolf attacks the flock and scatters it. The man runs away because he is a hired hand and cares nothing for the sheep. “I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me—  just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep. John 10:11-15

    “Therefore Jesus said again, “Very truly I tell you, I am the gate for the sheep.  All who have come before me are thieves and robbers, but the sheep have not listened to them. I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved…” John 10:7-9 NIV

     “If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them wanders away, what will he do? Won’t he leave the ninety-nine others on the hills and go out to search for the one that is lost? And if he finds it, I tell you the truth, he will rejoice over it more than over the ninety-nine that didn’t wander away! In the same way, it is not my heavenly Father’s will that even one of these little ones should perish.” Matthew 18:12-14 NIV

    “It was the precious blood of Christ, the sinless, spotless Lamb of God.” 1 Peter 1:19 NLT

    Even John 10:27 expands, “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.”

    The use of sheep analogies in the Bible is not an accident; God is very intentional with His symbolism and comparisons. We are just like sheep. Helpless, we need a leader because we wander off. We need community, water, and grains to live. We respond to voices we know, and we need to be taken care of. Jesus calls Himself a shepherd, which can point to His genealogy, as David was also a shepherd who paid close attention to his flock. Jesus says He leaves the 99 for the one, something I have experienced myself. When our loving God speaks, it is intentional.

    He says He calls us by name and we know His voice. That is not just physical, but when Jesus calls us, our spirit recognises that He is the Son of God. Just like shepherds are the only way for sheep to live, Jesus is the only way to eternal life. A shepherd doesn’t get angry that his sheep depend on him, but he expects it. God tells us to follow Him and His commands because of His knowledge and love for us. He is our good shepherd and I trust Him to guide me. 

     This shows that God, as our shepherd, knows us by name, calls on us and we follow him. Did you know that sheep also know their own names? When their shepherd calls them, they listen and actually recognise the voice of their shepherd. That is the voice of safety, the voice that knows how to protect and where to find food and water. That voice comforts them and assures them that they will be taken care of. We are not simply followers of a god, but of the only true and living God. The one who knows our name and knows every hair on our heads, and who has great plans for our lives.

    I will never look at the manger the same. It is more than a feeding trough, but the place my Savior lay. He became the food for His flock for us, by laying down His life, spilling His blood for sins that weren’t His to begin with. Historically, the manger was most likely stone, reflecting Jesus as the Rock of Ages, our cornerstone, and the foundation of life. From His first moments, even the rocks cried out that He is God. His tomb, also carved from stone, would later prove unable to hold Him.

    The Christmas story resonates so deeply; it is within us and is the true reason to celebrate this season. God made His presence known to the lowly; He lay in a manger and rescued us from our sins. He became bread for our spirit when he was laid in that manger. His word is our daily bread, and He is the Word; the true embodiment of God’s divine will. He bridges the gap between sin and eternal life. His forgiveness cleanses every wound, every dark thing, and all sin. His words can pull us out of any darkness we experience. Jesus is the only way to eternal life, and His birth story is just one of many beautiful testaments to His life. I pray you are blessed with His presence this Christmas; it is the only thing our souls can truly look forward to. 

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  • Dangers of Lust Pt.1

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  • What is an American School?

    I always hated the thought of being a teacher growing up. I told myself I would never become a teacher because they aren’t treated well or paid enough, yet I find myself in positions to teach constantly. At every job I’ve had, it has taken about 2 months, and I start training new people. My first job after moving out at 18 was teaching in daycare. Once I found God and began attending church in my hometown, I taught Sunday school and Wednesday night classes. I always end up loving it despite my preconception of the job. 

    I recently started subbing for a high school, and once again, despite warnings about the struggles of this job, I love it. I love the kids and want them to do well and enjoy a prosperous life. I have so many thoughts about this new job. I do not care about how much I’m getting paid. Being with kids and teaching them is the most rewarding job to me. Of course, I want to make an adult amount of money and make enough to save and for bills, extra for things I want, but I would do this work for free if I could. Funny how things change. 

    Because of this new experience, I am realizing all sorts of new things about myself. I love to teach, I love education, I love community, and people need so much more love. But just being nice will not help as much as love and discipline can. 

    Proverbs 22:15 says, “Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child;

    The rod of discipline will remove it far from him.” 

    And Proverbs 29:15 says, “The rod and reproof give wisdom,

    But a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother.”

    The journey of becoming a Christian has shown me new ways to live my life. Teaching helps me see where I lack, and quickly. I know now I need to become less reactive and more proactive. I need to bring discipline to my teaching, or else they will not find a way to respect me. But growing up with an abusive family, I have always been softer to people. I give mass amounts of grace and mercy, and I’m learning not to give too much. That is another reason I love subbing. I get to learn how to improve in multiple areas of my life while helping fill holes in my community. God blessed me with this opportunity, and now with the knowledge of what direction I would like to take my career. 

    I have many wonderful things to say about my newfound love, but oh, the troubles it comes with as well. I have never seen high school the way I see it now. I have only had this job for a short time, and already I have learned things about teenagers that I never knew, and never wanted to. And it has led me down the rabbit hole about Generation Alpha. 

    For many reasons, this generation is very different from mine, Generation Z. And yes, I recognize the problems within my peers, but that is a separate conversation. Gen A may be close in age, but much different in approach and experience. I love the kids I teach, but because of my love for them, I also see the deep-seated problems in the classroom. Do we blame covid for the lack of attention these children receive at home? I was a teenager during covid and yes it sucked, but it only gave my parents all the more time to pay attention to my siblings and I. And I don’t know that I feel specifically neglected because of the pandemic, but that is a question I would like to have an answer for. I know through studies I found my senior year that teenagers were using more substances during covid, and felt more responsibility at a younger age. Asking people around me, I have heard stories about how children during the pandemic have changed completely and not necessarily for the better. 

    Of course, I do not have any children and do not know what it is like to be younger and go through covid during elementary school, and I’m sure the shift in childhood experiences must have been extreme. Going from blowing bubbles outside with friends, barbeques with family, and constant sleepovers to quarantined and alone has to do something detrimental to the developing brain. I know we all feel lonelier than ever, regardless of the sources we blame.

    People thrive in community. Multiple cultures are seen to value it more than America tends to, and you see the difference in their anxiety and depression rates. It is harder to feel the weight of the world when multiple people are carrying it with you. Even in the Bible, Jesus speaks on the importance of communion with the body of Christ, and he is a great example of healthy living. He was always finding time for friends, the poor, children, and those in need. He knew the right balance of social and private life.  

    So there are multiple possibilities for this neglected generation. Reasons that these kids are left to their own devices, video games, and to themselves. Loneliness kills ,and you can ask just about anyone and get a similar response: people don’t like being alone all the time. So many students have told me things that are concerning about the state of the American home. They often joke about their abusive and alcoholic parents, complain about going home, beg to stay at school, and as a whole, have repeatedly said “They won’t care” when I mention telling their parents something important about them or their education. 

    Whatever the reason, these kids are struggling. I cannot stand the constant blame on the teachers and the school system. I do my best to see both sides of every story, and in public school, teachers are not meant to be parents. Parents who do less than the bare minimum cannot blame teachers for simply doing a very difficult job. Every teacher has flaws, and every parent, as well as the students themselves. But each person in this system plays an important role. 

    The notion that parents are paying the teachers’ salaries is an entitled one I am tired of hearing. We all pay our taxes and expect them to be used wisely, but that does not mean we should go around telling people how to do their government jobs. Teachers need more support than ever, teaching in a time where technology and the students are constantly changing with the culture. Responsibility for teachers is greater while their pay stays the same. They are dealing with an indifferent spirit in the children, where they can not be convinced to care about anything. 

    In the same breath, the students are expected to do a normal amount of work with even less support than the generation before them… or too much support. “Gentle parenting” has become a new joke among Gen Z to highlight the lack of responsibility for the parents of Gen A. Many parents are neglecting discipline for their children under the guise of “gentle parenting”. The notion in itself is not necessarily bad, but the idea that letting children determine right from wrong and their own punishments is a whole world of wrong. Children need parents to guide and lead them, not protect them from every uncomfortable situation the world has to offer. They avoid any growth in the same way they can scroll away from any uncomfortable thing on their phones. This is an easy way to hide from actual parenting skills like setting boundaries and limits, things that children desperately need. Without proper guidance, attention, and limits, these students are becoming increasingly addicted to their phones, vulgar with their peers, and careless with their actions.

    Every person in a community needs to step up to help solve this issue. Parents need to pay close attention to their children to know what their child is going through, teachers need support and to do the best they can at their jobs, students need to hold themselves accountable and help their peers do the same, and community members need to be willing to share and help when called upon. Teachers need to communicate with parents, and parents need to know their child well enough to see when they are struggling. We all want to see Generation A prosper in knowledge, skills, and in life. We all have ways to help accomplish that.

    I know what it’s like to be the stressed student, the overwhelmed teacher, and I have seen many stressed parents. I know we are all under a lot of pressure to be better, hustle, pay bills, be extraordinary, but when we focus on the small details when it comes to the upcoming generation, it will take a lot off of our shoulders. Our relationships can be symbiotic; we can help each other thrive. Thank you for reading this far, and please, if you have any perspective or insight on this issue, comment on this blog to be a part of the conversation. This may not be my last post on this topic, so know that there is more to be said and more action to be taken. Do your part where you are, and notice the difference in the people around you. 

  • Why Share the Gospel? A Personal Reflection

    We all need Jesus

    Sometimes I wonder why it’s so important to share the gospel. How silly, now writing it out, because we all NEED the gospel, we need Jesus. I know I was wicked before knowing Jesus, and I am saved for eternity with him and only because of his sacrifice. And I love telling people about Jesus! I realize now that there are people who grew up or are growing up in environments where they don’t have that Christian mom or grandma to drag them to church. Some people grow up in cults, in witchcraft or paganism, as Buddhists or Muslims. Not everyone has heard the gospel as soon as they need to from people who love Jesus, who have been called to spread the good news to the whole earth. 

    Growing up “Perfect” and Spiritually Blind

    Growing up, I was called “perfect”. It bothered me and put this heavy responsibility on my shoulders, and I didn’t understand that I could be a sinner, too. Ignorance is bliss, and I was just living my little kid life. I was unaware of the ways I was sinful, at least in a way where I felt condemned. I didn’t feel strong urges to do terrible things because I knew it was bad and I would get in trouble. At Sunday school, they told us that when we break one of the 10 commandments, we are sinning, or ignore what God wants, we are sinners. I knew that, technically, and I didn’t forget it. I just didn’t have the fear of God in me yet. Part of it was my faith in God; I knew he always had my back, so I didn’t worry much about the details. Part of this problem was that I didn’t notice my sins, or even see those sinful behaviors as bad. For example, fighting with my siblings or not doing what my parent had asked me. Or judging others, especially for things I also did. Many people are blissfully unaware of what a true moral code is, the one that the God of Jacob and Jesus laid out for us in the Holy Bible. Some people still do not know why Jesus died, that he is 100% God and man, or that he is the fulfillment of over 300 prophecies in the Old Testament. I hope to help change that. 

    The Gospel Through the Lens of History

    In the first few chapters of Genesis, we instantly see how easily humanity falls into sin. Further on, we read about how God made laws for his people; they fell away, came back to God, and marched through this cycle continuously. We then see how prophets and leaders are sent to inspire change in the people, and how they were often killed for being different. We see how people born hundreds of years before Jesus describe him perfectly in prophecy without knowing what they did. We see cross-references and the breath of God himself blown onto thousands of pages, proof among proof that God is real and he does talk to us. 

    We see how the world comes to a precipice in the Roman Empire and how radical a simple carpenter with wise words rocks their world. We can start to wonder, even just historically, why God would send such a Son at a time like that? As a man with no honor, a prophet with no money, a leader with no title, yet people have debated for thousands of years whether he was truly God.  If we could prove this historical carpenter was just a man, how is it that we still talk about it? His name is still on our lips. So yes, Jesus is a household name, but do we truly know him? Do we know he is God, sent to die for our sins, and we are wretched sinners? I think our culture is blinded by our sins, and I know the love of Jesus is the only cure. 

    I Need Jesus, too

    Even I, as a Christian, have to remind myself daily of the gospel. It took almost a year for me to stop feeling so guilty for not being perfect, and that feeling can come back. We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. The problem I am witnessing is that we have become desensitized to the wicked and ugly things in life. Culture relies on what brings pleasure, not goodness. Morals aren’t popular, and neither is living biblically. Christian behavior is partially the blame. The quote “No hate like Christian love” is wildly popular and for a reason. The same reason I left the church at 17. Not all Christians are aware of themselves and how they can hurt other people with their judgments and words. It is not our place to play God and pretend we know other people’s hearts. I wish we would live up to the commandment to love one another as Jesus loves us. I know the world would be easier to live in. 

    Thank God I Went Through Hell

    The gospel should be so simple to tell others, and it is. Experience trumps knowledge, and that makes me so thankful I went through hell before finding Jesus. When I did finally come back to the faith, I finally had the fear of God in me. I understood that he is all-powerful, knows everything, and still chooses to love me. He gave me mercy after all the bad things I’ve done, and it is terrifying to think I could’ve lost that love. I could have gone to hell living the life I chose. I did all the things I wanted to do, gave in to my flesh at every turn and my desires became my gods. I am beyond thankful that Jesus pursued me and granted me access to the most beautiful and fulfilling life yet. I get eternal life because Jesus never gave up on me. 

    The Truth that We Need is Sugar-Free

    I recently had the opportunity to share the gospel with someone online, and they asked questions, and I answered based on my knowledge and experience. This person had gone through horrible things in their childhood, and they wanted to know why a good and faithful God of everything would allow that to happen. I used to ask those questions, too, so I understood. They wanted to know if sinners could go to church as well, and I told them that I did, and I still am a sinner. We all fall short, and that’s why we need Jesus. He loved us, so we can love him. He died for us so we can live. He is all that we will ever need, and it is the greatest gift of life. Something so good should be shared with everyone. I am so glad I went through some similar rough times so I could relate the gospel to someone who needed to hear it real and blunt. I didn’t sugarcoat anything because the truth doesn’t need sugar. The gospel stands strong all on its own.

    Shame and guilt will pull us away from God, and the enemy loves to use those to hurt us. When we bring our burdens to a God who loves us, we are renewed and get restored strength. I want everyone to have the opportunity to have that comfort in this life, and the insurance that we will be with Jesus in heaven for eternity. My life has had many challenges since finding Jesus, but it has never been easier. I have someone to walk through life with me, to guide and comfort me in good and bad times, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything. I used to be completely alone, I did anything I wanted, but I was scared and lonely. Now, even in the darkest alleys and loneliest places, I have a God who is my friend, my savior, my husband, and my life. 

    Share The Good Gift!

    I think it can be used for good to know that we fall short of the glory of God. I like knowing that I can and need to do better. It keeps me close to God. If you get that pull from the Holy Spirit that someone you know could benefit from hearing the gospel from you, let God use you and bring that person to salvation. It’s the least we can do. We can depend on his perfection in everything. We can rest knowing he has everything under control. We fall short, but the love of Jesus fills that gap perfectly. 

  • Crochet Course | Learn Crochet Quickly

    It’s official… 

    After many hours of hard work, writing, proofing, and re-reading, the Crochet Course from BusyVandCo is done! Once you select the tier 1 Crochet Course for $3 below this article, you will receive the BusyVandCo Crochet Course!

    If you want to learn crochet and prefer advice from an experienced crocheter, I have just what you need! For $3, you can receive the whole BusyVandCo Crochet Course right to your device. Print off for easy reading, reference the course when you’re stuck, and ultimately learn a new skill you will enjoy for the rest of your life! It comes with guides, pictures, a vocabulary, a glossary, and a short quiz to help you and test your knowledge. Everything you need to start crocheting is in one place, and can be yours forever!

    Learning a new skill like crochet can be intimidating, so I wrote an all-inclusive Crochet Course for beginners. With all the information you need to begin crocheting, you will be making your favorite fiber art in no time. It is all about doing things the right way, and your way. With no hard rules, only guidelines to make you a better artist overall, you will love learning how to crochet. 

    When you buy this course, you’re doing more than just learning crochet. You are helping put a young woman through college to become a secondary educator, something this world needs more of. We are nothing without our education system and teachers, and buying this course helps me pursue my dreams of being an artist and a support system for my community. 

    I hope this community continues to grow and advance into a bright future of creative education. Thank you for sharing your love for learning a new skill!

    Copyright BusyVandCo 2025.

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  • A Girl in the Mountains

    Living secluded is a tricky thing. In Idaho, it can be more common than not.

    I live where there are mountains and valleys with no neighbors for miles. There is an easy entry into manipulation and abuse when isolated. For example, in the wild, many predators lure their prey where no one else can see it. I know what that’s like.

    I loved the mountain at my childhood home—plenty of pine trees for forts and rocks for jumping on. I had a whole pretend life on that mountain; its steep sides made it a challenge for little me. Juneberries blossomed and ripened around every corner, making the perfect snack in the summer. I had a kitchen, dining room, garden, and workshop in those trees. The large black rock I would climb on to read and write was a landmark to that hill. Often, I was driven outside in tears over my Dad’s yelling or parents’ arguing and outbursts, and my dog would meet me on that big rock. He was always there for me in the worst times, he knew when I was not okay. 

    I felt alone a lot as a kid, even with a big family in a small town. I read many books, had crafting hobbies like weaving and crochet, and loved getting muddy outdoors. I was timid and afraid of getting hurt, and worse, I was terrified of getting in trouble. The eldest daughter has a lot on her shoulders, and I was determined to save the world somehow. But I was content with the idea of really helping at least one person. 

    At first, I enjoyed my alone time. There was no stress, freedom in the fresh air, and no one to yell at me. I would talk to God or my dog and write in my journal endlessly. I was creative and energetic, so I always had something to do. I can say I am generally about the same now. Just as I was then, I am a particularly emotional person. Not in a reactive way, but in a very internalized manner. I have had a habit since childhood of not speaking unless I had to. I just observed and took mental notes. I’m sure it comes from a fear of getting in trouble or being targeted, and especially a fear of being ignored. I had a sense that if no one wanted to listen, I then have nothing to say. I was worried I was a burden to my family, and if I had nothing good to say, then I wouldn’t say anything. Habits like that were so common for me to continue as I grew up. I wanted to be invisible, out of the way, and not a burden to anyone. I desired more than anything to make my parents’ lives easier and for them to love me. 

    I think God made mountains for such beautiful reasons. I know the mountains have healed things in me, even though they can’t talk. Living in multiple different states, I felt sick without the mountains. The thrill of climbing them, the way they grow out of the horizon in sunset lighting, the trees and animals that they home. I have always and will always love mountains. They are difficult too. They require tough treks, good shoes, stamina, and determination to get to the top (and even some bravery coming down). Moses took adventures to the tops of mountains to speak to God; the theme of spiritual journeys to mountains is common in the Bible. From Noah’s Ark to The Sermon on the Mount, mountains play a big role in the ways of humanity and our relationship with God. I am so thankful and blessed that God allowed me to be surrounded by them, for the ability to climb them and simply see them with my own eyes. 

    When I was 18 and moved out of the house, I started giving myself stick-and-poke tattoos. I started with a bee on my knee, which is now my business logo, and then a heart on my sleeve. I added mountains inside the heart because to me, that’s where the mountains will always be. I had a lot of fun in my childhood climbing up the rough ridges and hills along my family’s property. As an Idaho kid, scraping your knees on rocks and getting covered in dirt was normal. There’s a good reason I don’t wear a lot of white…

    God speaks to me on the mountains. Not loud and bright like in Moses’ story, but gently and kindly like a good Father does to his daughter. He would enter into my imaginary worlds and guide me to better choices. There were some rough days in the mountains. One particular day, I tried to take my life, but God had much better plans for me. I ate plants that weren’t edible in hopes I would slowly die, and my parents would finally pay attention to me. Thank God for his sovereignty and ways, that I was not even sick or close to dying. I just had every intention of letting go. I thought the world would be better off without me. 

    Turns out, you can’t help people by taking your own life. And then you’ll miss out on all the mountains God wants you to climb. I will ask you to do one thing for me since you’ve read this far. If you see or sense abuse, don’t keep quiet. Speak about it until something changes. Be there for the people you know have a lot going on, and especially those who seem to always be happy and have everything together. We don’t know the mountains of pain that can hide behind someone’s big smile. 

    I know from living in a small town that a lot of abuse gets overlooked. “Jimmy doesn’t get beat, so it can’t be that bad” type of mindsets are common. 78% of abuse is neglect, and studies have shown that if babies are left alone with no love and attention, they die. It is important to keep an eye out for different behaviors like drug use, isolation, and depression, because they can be signs of abuse. April is Child Abuse Prevention Month. To show your support for the children being abused, please talk to your friends, family, and community members and educate each other on the dangers of abuse. Thank you for reading, and remember God is with you and loves you more than life itself. 

    CAP Month