Tag: christianity

  • Banana Squash Muffin Recipe

    Winter keeps me indoors here in the cold mountains of Idaho, but homemade muffins keep me warm on the inside. Winter squash has taken over the house since we received three gigantic banana squash! I had to find recipes to use it up. I found out winter squash has many healthy nutrients and can be used for savory and sweet dishes. This winter squash is seriously slept on.

    I tried it roasted with cinnamon and brown sugar and loved the flavor so much. After making amazing pumpkin cookies, this recipe popped into my mind. I didn’t see any other recipes like this, so I had to make it my own! To make sure these muffins were sweet, I added mashed bananas to create a soft and fluffy texture, which worked so beautifully.

    Get the pumpkin chocolate chip recipe here!

    Organic Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

    With all that squash I had to make my own squash puree for this recipe. To do this I sliced the squash into 12 pieces, cut off the outside layer, greased a sheet pan, and baked it at 400 degrees for an hour. Once they had 5 minutes to cool, I pureed them in a food processor.

    This recipe used organic flour, bananas, and sugar. This version is dairy-free but can be made with dairy products in the same portions.

    Instead of making you read on forever, here is a simple recipe graphic you can download or screenshot!

    Banana Squash Muffin RecipeDownload

    These muffins turned out perfectly soft and fluffy, flavorful and nutritious. I recommend them for children and even as a breakfast muffin. You can add less sugar I found out because the chocolate chips make up for the sweetness. Enjoy this recipe and comment on how it turned out for you! Contact us for questions and updates!

  • What Happened to Me When I Took Magic Mushrooms

    I was 19 when I started micro-dosing psychedelic mushrooms with my ex-boyfriend. We would take turns, go on walks, and describe our experiences to each other. Micro-dosing brought a lot of good feelings, often very subtle changes like a more open mind, realizing the interconnectedness of life, and appreciation of nature. At the time I was a pagan practicing witchcraft. That being said, these types of experiences were not foreign to me. I was always looking to find answers in nature and indulging in my flesh.

    Previous to this, when I was 17 I had left the Christian church for various reasons, one being the disconnect I had with God, the bad treatment of scripture in church and the lack of love from its members. I did not realize at the time I was blaming God for what his children had done. 

    One night I accidently took much more than a micro-dose. We didn’t have a scale yet and we were eating mushrooms with pizza. When I thought I was taking maybe about 1 gram, I took about 4.5 grams. That is just about a macro dose, especially for a 5’4 girl who has never eaten that much mushroom before. I slowly started falling asleep and woke up to a vision. 

    When I woke up I looked down to the carpet and saw fractal marching men all walking together. I started laughing to myself because it made so much sense, men marching on carpets that men march on. It was so funny to me that the carpet would be made up of what it is used for and by. It is still funny to my brain today. I looked in the mirror, something people tell you never to do on mushrooms, and my face was the moon, but my face. I looked so sad and I still don’t know how to describe it. When I went back to lie down on my bed, the light from the sun slowly started casting through my window onto the ceiling. I started to see how the light itself shifted into a presence, it was quite peaceful and I felt very comfortable with him there. 

    Shapes started appearing, I saw angels appear around clouds, below them apostles, below them disciples, below them my family and friends in heaven. I recognized all of them and they all were smiling down at me. I started to feel so much love, it was pouring out of the light. I felt tangible unconditional, eternal love start pouring into me. I started smiling, giggling, and laughing at this beautiful feeling. It felt like being in love. It was an effortless feeling like I was floating in space. As I realized it, God started speaking to me internally without words, but through understanding and wisdom. He started telling me things I don’t remember, but I do remember feeling so happy and loved. I knew God was standing above me, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and The Father. I knew right there he was three in one. He was eternally all three at once, and all three separately. It was a profound feeling even while I lay there in the most open and understanding place of my life. 

    The best part was feeling God’s love pour into me. It was a fatherly love I had never had, a brotherly love I needed, and a comforting love I could rest in. I felt worthy despite my sin and shame. I felt loved despite being in a relationship with a man who didn’t love me. Many times I go back to that place mentally, hoping to remember that feeling of love. It is worth more than anything in this world. It is what heaven may feel like. It is worth a whole life of obedience to grasp even for a moment. 

    The vision itself was exciting. Now looking back I would never do drugs like that again. Not because I didn’t enjoy them, but because it is an illegal way to reach spiritual realms and it is a very easy way for the enemy to attack and lie. Prayer and fasting are a much better and Biblical way to reach God and hear his voice more clearly. A free source for that would also be reading the Bible. One important part of this vision was that after all I saw, heard, felt, and experienced I still did not believe in Jesus. Seeing is not believing. Although through taking mushrooms I was open to more spiritual truth, I did not understand that Jesus is God, and what I saw WAS truth! How insane that I had this crazy experience but it was months later I finally saw God for who he is, as much as I could. It took months of God convincing me he is real, the God of the Christian bible is real. How graceful is God for giving me chance after chance to see him in his true light. He gave me time and proof that he is real. God is such a gentleman, pursuing me with patience and vigor, never giving up on his bride. I only hope to have a faithful love like his. 

    Mushrooms in a way made me see God, but it was God himself, putting his manifest presence into my sinfulness that got me to love and believe in him. He is the most kind, most caring, most loving being to ever exist. How wonderful that the God of the universe cares for someone as small as me. God reaches to us in our darkness and pulls us out without blemishing his own light. He alone is Holy, Holy, Holy. He alone is good. God alone is faithful and true. I am so blessed and thankful to have a God so good that he would appear to me while I did such a stupid thing like drugs. Thank you Jesus, thank you Lord. 

  • Cook. Clean. Timing.

    What I have learned through a survey I made has really opened my eyes in ways I didn’t expect.

    Cook. Clean. Timing. 

    I have always seen women and mothers struggle in silence my whole life, and from an early age I have wanted to help people. For my business I created a survey and sent it to women and mothers I know, so I can gauge what needs are unmet and how I can make products and services that make a difference in their lives. So far many results are just what you might expect. They need more time, help with kids and chores, and feel a bit alone at times. 

    One statistic that surprised me is that most of the surveyed mothers have two kids. I had this idea that my community had much more children than that, and it was interesting to see that result. The age ranges of the mothers and their children were so vast it was honestly beautiful to see diversity in that area. I am happy to know so many people in all walks of life. 

    One question I asked “Have you always wanted to be a mom?” and to my surprise about 19% did not always want to be a mom. The majority of results came from married people, and beyond that it varied from single to co-parenting to divorced. 

    The thing that interested me the most was the areas they needed more help. A common theme in the survey results was that these women need more help in time management, getting kids organized, help around the house, getting ready for the day, and motivation to have routine. In my mind, all the people I knew had everything all together, they had no problems and I was the only one struggling. Oh what a lie. It doesn’t matter if you have 1 or 6 kids, there are struggles with all areas of that. It doesn’t get easier just because you turn 50 and you’ve lived longer, you will still struggle. Loneliness is still lonely no matter how old you are and how many friends you’ve made. As women, stewarding our time and assets can be difficult, but we are all struggling together. My hope is that we don’t ignore our neighbors’ problems, but help them solve those problems together. 

    Mark 12:30-31

    “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”

    God commands us to love each other, and in a world where we feel threatened by outsiders, government and lack, it would make a big difference to us to use love instead. When we look at all the problems we have it can help us remember there is always someone going through the same thing. We aren’t alone, God did not make us that way. God wants us to participate in communion with one another. So if you can think of one person right now who needs help, help them. Do your good deeds in love remembering how Jesus loves us even at our worst. 

    I am so happy to know my community better and to have more ideas on how I can help them. Comment below or reach out to me if you’d like to be a part of my newest ideas on how we can help each other in the community. Or if you have suggestions on how you’d like to be helped or help others please let me know. 

    God bless you and Merry Christmas!

    https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfGX9srruKq1K3dPfOjKFl93ufW2I2eHMratc12NL1qdU9-PQ/viewform?usp=sf_link

  • Sovereignty of God

    I am learning about a beautiful characteristic of God, sovereignty. The word itself feels like it needs to be capitalized, it is so bold, big, and strong. Living a childhood with a distant father, it has become such a blessing to see and feel my father in heaven truly sees me and takes care of every detail. He made me and within me is him, and within him is my identity. He is mine and I am his. But this is not about me, this is about God.

    God is everywhere at once, he comes when we cry out to him, and rests upon those he loves when they worship him. When we revere The Great Living God, The God of Israel, The Lord of Armies, Yahweh, Yeshua, our soul shifts. His truth is the truth. No matter what storm rattles the doors from outside, he stands strong. At Bible study this week, Philippians 4:6 was mentioned. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” God has his hand on us, his hand is on everything. 

    How sovereign of God. To fix his eyes on us while we sin against him. To take our burdens when they pile on our chests and shoulders. To hear us when we barely listen to him. His emotions don’t get the better of him, he doesn’t give up when he realizes he is doing the group project all by himself. He is bigger and better than our every effort. It is funny how hard we try sometimes. God has got us. He sees us, every part of our mind, every inch of our hearts, he sees our situations at work and with friends and he is in every room we are not in. 

    Stop here, and breathe. God has got this under control.

    He humbles the proud and exalts the lowly. He weaves his perfect will in every area we open to him, he takes our seeds of obedience and plants a garden as big as Eden. He is sovereign, he is the only God. And only through Jesus Christ and his perfect holy sacrifice we can now live the life he gave up for us. What a good, good, good, friend. After we yelled at him, forgot him, lied to him, blasphemed him, he picked up that cross, and died on calvary for us. He loves us over and over and over again. How can we neglect such love? God didn’t need us, yet out of his loving heart he created a family to share love, creativity and community with. 

    I had a crazy spiritual walk this and last year 2023-2024. I went from claiming the title of pagan witch and going through multiple spiritual awakenings, did psychedelic mushrooms, and got reintroduced to God. I have been through much spiritual warfare, have just about read the whole Bible and completely turned my life upside down to follow God. I almost got kidnapped twice, was utterly hopeless, broke up with a boyfriend and lost a whole life I thought I loved. One thing I saw right away as I found God again was that his hand was on me the whole time. He made sure I was safe when I put myself into bad situations, he stopped me from getting kidnapped twice and loved me when I didn’t know who he was. God is sovereign. I realized through walking with Jesus, that he is a God of details, he cares about the small things. He cares about things you hold near to your heart and he cares about making things just. He is so so good. 

    Psalm 46:10 “He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;

        I will be exalted among the nations,

        I will be exalted in the earth.””

    God tells me this exactly when I need to hear it. Sometimes it is when I am running around like crazy trying to do everything myself, when I feel alone, when I don’t know where to turn. I think regardless of where we are in life, it is so important to remember God has a plan and will continue it despite what we are capable of, and how small our faith may seem. Always obey him and the Holy Spirit’s guidance in your life, develop your relationship with God and lay your burdens down to him. 

    Matthew 11:28-30 “ Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

    I find the only rest I can actually have, is rest in the Lord. I cannot rest the same with a mindset that I can rest by myself, but when I trust in Jesus to give me the rest he promised me, I get the best rest possible. 

    God is powerful above all things. There is nothing we can do to take power away from God. There is nothing on this earth that can compete with the love of God. His hand will always prevail, his plans are good and higher, and his will be done. We desperately need him. God restores us in ways we could never do ourselves. I am thankful for that. 

    Romans 8:38-39  “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

    I want to bring you hope, that in every trial, every argument, every battle, God is sovereign and he will provide, he will prosper. God loves his children and he loves taking care of us. Let yourself be taken care of and fall into the arms of your loving Father. No matter where you are, if you have run away, if the church has hurt you and you can’t look back on the pain, God is waiting for you with open arms. Come back to him. I hope you learn more about the sovereignty of God and trust him to order your steps.

  • Foolproof Apple Pie

    Apple pie is a staple to any American home, and as a woman I get a lot of joy from baking food for the people I love. I have always shared my treats with friends and family. Watching baking shows growing up increased my passion for it and my goal is to perfect recipes like this for my future family, so they can say it’s moms homemade apple pie. 

    This recipe came from a few different sources. The crust is inspired by a Betty Crocker recipe, and the filling I had help from my grandma to make. My friend at work helped me learn how to make good pie crusts and how to slit them so they cook better. I used apples from my grandma’s garden, picked them myself. I peeled and sliced them and added in my grandma’s homemade applesauce as she suggested. 

    The crust was perfect, it held the filling in so well and was crumbly and had that classic pie flavor. The filling was also so flavorful, the only thing I would change is I would add more apples because the crust held it so well, the pie could be even bigger! If you try this recipe let me know, and suggestions are welcome. 

  • Ways we unknowingly practice witchcraft: How to stop it

    Ways we unknowingly practice witchcraft: How to stop it

    As a believer in Jesus Christ and a former pagan witch, it is my responsibility to inform people about the ways in which witchcraft and paganism have kept ways hidden in plain sight, to spot out the cultural habits we practice that are simply wrong for any Christian to be doing. This will convict people, but Jesus says

    “Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” Matthew 16:24-25

    The reason I really felt the need to share this is to help other women and men in Christ to be renewed in their minds, but also because when I was a pagan witch, I took pride in the many small daily habits and rituals that were founded in paganism and wicca practices. Because of that and now coming to know Christ, it has become abundantly clear other Christians do not have a clue about these things, and I want to shed light on it.

    1. Knock on wood

    Yes, many people can argue about how this phrase and ritual came about, but there is no refuting that it has been used in pagan circles for many years now. I will just tell you the truth. Wood will not save you. A small ritual that depends on knocking on wood for “good luck” will not help you, especially in your Christian walk. When I was a witch, these superstitions were another ritual to give a sense of pride, to have some safe or lucky word or ritual to disperse fear, when in reality it only expands it further. The only wood that will save you is the fact that Jesus died on a cross, and the wood didn’t do the hard work it took to gain our salvation, Jesus did. 

    Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

    My recommendation is to stop trusting in silly superstitions and proclaim the truth of Christ and his promises over your life, do not give in to the spirit of fear any longer. 

    1.  Celebrating Halloween

    Ah yes, I am the party pooper. But this is coming from an ex-witch. Do not celebrate Halloween. I am speaking to Christians, we are to submit ourselves to Christ, not to the world. Halloween has obvious pagan roots, portrays many kinds of evils, desensitizes us to things like demons and spirits, and speaking with the dead. This holiday may have some Catholic roots, but that does not erase the wiccan history it holds. Many rituals are common practice during halloween. If the ghost and demon face paint isn’t enough to turn you away as a Christian (symbols are very important in spirituality) then maybe the thought of partaking in a holiday that uplifts divination, necromancy and casting curses should. There are witches that go around during Halloween, casting curses on houses, bloodlines, Christians, and all sorts of innocent people all because of demonic and satanic influence. When I wasn’t a Christian, I loved Halloween. It was filled with lust, passion, alcohol, outfits that show far too much skin, and darkness. And I was a witch doing “light magic” , a magic considered to be good and done with righteous intentions, yet I was still in wickedness and others were willingly doing worse things than me. There are depths to this darkness and it is not something we as Christians can play with. If you struggle with this idol, please take it to Jesus and ask him to speak with you about it, he loves you so much and wants the best for you. This is not to condemn you, but to warn you of the dangers I was closely associated with in the past. If you need something to celebrate, finding Biblical traditions, feast days and holidays is becoming more popular and I find to be much more respectful to God. 

    1. Saying “Bless you” after you sneeze

    The Lord has asked me to write about this instance, and has pointed out it is a superstitious act, one started because of the false belief that when one sneezed, their soul would leave their body. Since that is not true and we can hold firm to our trust and belief in God, there is no reason to say it especially in the manner we do. If you would rather like to pray for someone, that is a better alternative. This was not one I was expecting, but I obey the Lord first and foremost. We do not need to say “Bless you” in order to protect from evil spirits, but we do need to pray. 

    These are just a few examples and there are many more. I will write about them in the future. For now, keep an eye out and let God transform you by the renewing of your mind. (Romans 12:2)

    It is important that in this Chrstian walk, we put Jesus and our love for him above all things. Otherwise those other things become strongholds and idols. Our God is a jealous God, one who needs our undivided attention. This blog is not made to condemn people ,but to open the eyes that have once been blind, to educate God’s children on the ways our culture desensitizes us to witchcraft. We have to be of sober mind, have ears to hear and eyes to see. We need to educate ourselves on things of light and darkness, for ourselves and the ones we love. It is too easy in this modern world for demons and evil spirits to convince us these little sayings and rituals are harmless, but the closer you get to God, the more you will hate the things he hates, and see life as he sees it. The biggest illusion is that satan and demons are not real– they are in your Bible and I promise you, they are real.

    In order to stop these habits we need to give ourselves grace and realize the reason we change our habits in the first place. Remind yourself daily who you are in Christ, a child of God, an heir to The Most High King, a conqueror, beautifully and wonderfully made. Remind yourself that God is more important, and have a relationship with God that is so close, he reveals these convictions to you before someone else does. I pray God is with you and protects you all the days of your life, amen. 

  • My Testimony

    Hi, I am Vanessa and I grew up Christian in Idaho. I was young when I first accepted Jesus, as my savior at 7 years old when it made sense to me, and baptized at 9 when I knew I wanted to live my life for Jesus, and he became my Lord at 13 when I gave him my life at a youth conference. I went to church a lot growing up, but with divorced parents and not having a consistent household or belief system, I was often thrown around in chaos. If I was with my dad we most likely wouldn’t go to church, if I was with my mom we would, and many times living part of the time with my grandparents, my grandma always made sure we went to church. I loved it growing up, the music was beautiful, my pastor was funny and made amazing chocolate chip cookies. 

    My biggest fear growing up was my Dad, and I struggled with fear all the way into adulthood. When I turned 18 I moved out hours away from family to live on my own. The first week there I was so afraid I didn’t leave the house for days, ate crackers and m&ms and hid from the world. That fear guided my every move. I slowly got myself to go to the grocery store, walk around the neighborhood and meet new people. By then I had left the church because I identified as pansexual, witnessed a very poor baptist preacher and I read books about all the bad things churches have done in history. As an angry teenager it was not a good mix, and with all the trauma I went through, I had many doubts about God. I wanted God to be real, so I told him if he was real, he would make himself known to me. Unfortunately I said it out loud, something that makes it easy for the devil to use against me. That assertion about God gave the enemy a very easy door into my personal perception of God. If I would have trusted in the Bible, I would have avoided a lot of confusion and mess. 

    Because I blamed God for what the church did, I was so distant from him and outside of his will. I thought I found this new freedom, I could do whatever I wanted. I was finally away from the abuse that haunted me and I thought living by my own rules would benefit me. But truly I was alone, stuck, suffering and dying in my sin. I went on lots of dates, made new friends and did what all “normal” college kids did. I drank at parties and smoked weed. I didn’t truly have the desire to smoke but because people around me were, it seemed like the thing to do. And I lived in Oregon where it was readily available. Every time I gave my flesh what it wanted, through my fear of missing out, it didn’t make me happy. It never filled me with joy. It didn’t bring me closer to God. The amount of trials I went through that made my life so difficult all could’ve been avoided if I trusted in God, if I read his word enough to know him deeply. Through it all, God still protected me when I didn’t deserve it. There were times I would drink or smoke and I would stay completely sober, confused but sober. There were two times I almost got kidnapped and God stood in between me and those men and let me walk freely, unharmed. Although I left God, he never left me. 

    God meets us at our level, and he met me at my lowest. I had moved to a different town to live with my then boyfriend, and living with him I became his girlfriend wife. I did all my wifely duties without his commitment. I worked constantly, at my job, then at home on my business, chores, helping him, taking care of his cat. I was constantly tired. I had gotten deep into new age spirituality, and identified as a pagan witch. I considered myself a white-witch, a term for someone who only does “good magic”. I was constantly learning new practices, belief systems, doing tarot card readings and using crystals. I had my hand in every pot of new age as I could find. I believed in aliens, greek deities, norse deities, signs and symbols, zodiac, birth charts, you name it. I had many friends who believed the same things, so my interest was always growing stronger. I really thought I was learning the truth. Last year I really started to get tired of how my boyfriend never believed in anything because it wasn’t scientific or the truth. 

    So I was determined to find the truth of the universe. My ex-boyfriend had started using mild psilocybin to stimulate his senses, and I slowly started using them too. I started to see how everything is connected, how everything breathes and lives and points to God. I really started to see how God is real, but I didn’t know who he was. I knew he was bigger than any deity, more vast than anything I have learned about and I knew he had a spirit because I could feel it. I called God “Spirit” for the longest time, which is flawed because of how vague it is, there are many spirits in this world. Once I took the largest dose I had ever taken, I fell asleep and woke up to this beautiful light cast on my ceiling from the sun through my window. The presence of God filled my room and he presented himself in light, so bright I could barely look at him. I knew then that he was Jesus, God the Father, and The Holy Spirit. My five pronged fan turned into the presence of Satan, I took one look, recognized him and just knew I had no fear of him, I pitied him. Angels appeared at the top of these clouds, a veil was drawn away and I started to see heaven. Below the angels were apostles, below them disciples, then followers of Christ, and my family. I knew the name of every one of God’s disciples, even though right now, even through reading my Bible and watching the chosen, I couldn’t name them all. While in this vision I knew who everyone was, and they were all smiling down to me. 

    God started speaking to me and filled me with this unconditional love, something I could never put into words. It was the best feeling a soul could experience. I was in the presence of God, being loved by him, and laughing at how everything had to happen this way. My trauma happened to make me stronger and enabled me to help others going through the same things, every choice I made, I did because of who I am and the options I had, my perspective and the way I was raised. The biggest lesson I took out of that experience was that God is love at his core, he loved me and Jesus is real. At the time, even through such a crazy experience, it didn’t get me to believe in God. It took months of me continuing to search for truth, struggling more with unemployment, a strained relationship and spiritual warfare. God never stopped pursuing me, I would find the presence of Jesus at my work and I was so confused by Jesus showing up to a pagan. He showed up on the walls in light that formed a cross. He showed up in food I was prepping at work, just pieces of broccoli with cracks in the shape of a perfect cross and the one that really got me was when I was eating Pad Thai one day. I was on break eating and felt the presence of God again and looked down to see a perfect cross made from two green onions, glowing at the top of my bowl. It was incredible and so personal, because I knew no one would believe me if I told them. But that got me to realize Jesus is God and made me believe in him.

     I started feeling called to go to church but I had no idea where to go and had never gone by myself before. I found a church through a friend and started going. The first day I went, I was late to worship but heard the music in the hallway. It felt like the church where I grew up, but different. The first thing the pastor said in that sermon was that God is love. At the time, that was the only thing I knew about God. I needed to keep listening. It was truly hearing the word of God that got me to believe in him.  

    Matthew 4:4 “Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’”

    God continues to reveal himself to me every day. He speaks to me through the clouds, music, animals, friends and family and through his word. He never stops speaking, even if I can’t hear his voice. He has shown me sides to him I never knew existed when my relationship with him was strained. Because I accepted his love and forgiveness by what Jesus did on the cross and rose three days later, I was able to have a better relationship with him. It took a lot of pruning in my life, old habits, friends, music, clothing, social media. Everything in my life had to be renewed to be in good relationship with God. 

    I kept going to that church and a few weeks later God told me to break up with my boyfriend and to follow him. So I did, though it was so hard, I listened to him and followed his guidance. I slowly started using the Bible to guide my life and it was transformative. Every question I had was answered in the Bible. Reading it I felt it come alive and read me. I felt God talking directly to my soul. I was never going to be the same. 

    I was led to get rid of my witchy items, tarot cards, books, crystals, decorations, altars and necklaces. I had two friends who convinced me to burn these necklaces I used for protection at church. It was so freeing and I was so happy I felt like a kid again. I had this joy that filled me, I was skipping and had not a worry in the world. The catholic community took such good care of me at that time, they were always there for me when I was crying or upset. They got me a place to live and supported me through my breakup. 

    The funniest thing was I saw God and didn’t believe in him, but when I heard his word and felt his presence, even seeing a perfect cross made of green onions… that’s what made me believe in God. All the parties I went to, all the substances I had, all I drank and puked, I had the most fun at a Catholic mardi gras party where we drank water and sang disney songs in karaoke. I was so surprised that I was completely sober and having so much fun. The way they accepted me although I was not Christian or Catholic was so loving, I knew God had something to do with it. 

    I am here to tell you, God is more real than we are. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life and no one gets to the father except through him. The Bible will answer all your questions about life and God, and Jesus is the only one who can be a good best friend. Drugs and parties and alcohol are a distraction and a waste of time, and only hurt your mind and body. You will never get high enough or drunk enough to fix your problems or heal your pain, but the closer you get to God, the more healed you become, the more life you will gain. 

    Romans 6:23 “For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

    God met me while doing things I shouldn’t have been, but I was fortunate God is a God of love and left the 99 sheep for me. We cannot abuse his love, he deserves all we can give. Jesus forgave me of my sin, but now I owe him my life for the sacrifice he gave for me. His death on the cross gave me mine, and his resurrection gives me the gift of eternal life. I am so thankful God pulled me out of my pit, so please don’t dig one for yourselves. 

    1 Peter 5:8-9 

     “Be alert and of a sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.”

    Just like the serpent convinced Eve to talk to him, to go against God’s will, to fear missing out, and to rebel, the devil was able to convince me he wasn’t real, hell wasn’t real and that I was living a righteous life. Now is the time to learn God’s voice versus the enemy’s, and know the truth yourself. 

    Hosea 4:6 

    “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because they have rejected knowledge, I will also reject them, that they shall be no priest to me: seeing they have forgotten the law of their God, I will also forget my children.”